SERIOUS POTTY TRAINING TIME

My husband and I complement each other in a lot of ways. He’s very laid back. I’m more hyper. He’s extremely patient. I’m umm…not patient. Regardless of how well we mesh, there are some ways in which we don’t. For instance it’s probably not a good idea for two people with serious gag reflexes to […]

SURVIVING AN AMUSEMENT PARK WITH A TODDLER

This week family who I haven’t seen in about 20 years is visiting us. So we’re doing all the fun things that we never do when it’s just the 3 of us, like braving the sun, heat and crowds for a day at an amusement park (which is why I’ve been MIA the past few […]

82% OF CHILDREN WHO DIE IN A HOT CAR WERE LEFT UNINTENTIONALLY

Stories like these give me chills (Baby dies, toddler hospitalized after being left in cars/Father Leaves Toddler in Hot Car). Before I became a parent, I’d instantly blame the parents. How can this happen?! Well, sometimes it is shitty parenting. However, most of the time, it’s because an exhausted parent was up all night with […]

HOW TO GET A DRINK IN MY HOUSE

I know what you’re thinking. — Really? You’re telling us how to get a glass of soda? — Well it’s not that easy in our household sometimes. Here’s what happened yesterday afternoon. When you have a toddler and a dog that qualifies as a canine senior citizen, it’s par for the course. Walk into kitchen […]

BEAUTY REDEFINED

I get this. I really do. I can understand wanting to create a doll with no hair so that little kids undergoing chemo can feel a little less different. But beautiful? I have to admit, as the mother of a daughter, the way this is worded increases my angst every time I see it. At […]

A FICKLE TODDLER AND HER LOVEY

When my daughter was first born many of my mommy friends already had toddlers (or even bigger kids) and would talk about their lovey. Apparently “the lovey” is any toy, blanket or other inseparable attachment that helps sooth kids in this big scary world (sort of a child’s version of your nightly glass of wine). […]

10 Ways in Which My Dog Prepared Me for Motherhood

Dare to utter the words cookie, ball, “go bye by” or outside and prepare for continual whining until you fulfill the promise. They play, sleep (if you’re lucky), eat and poop. Period. There’s ear shattering barking crying when distressed, annoyed, hungry or bored – or just for the hell of it. They will eat anything […]

DRIVING MISS CRAZY

Like most stay-at-home moms I spend my days wiping up splattered milk and singing kid’s songs until I end up looking a little something like this ——>. After spending 10 years in the world of meetings and deadlines, I can officially say that parenting is the most difficult, demanding, exhausting, patience-testing job ever. Unless you […]

COMMUNICATION BREAKDOWN

The diva and I struggle with a serious language barrier. She is screaming at me trying to get me to do what she wants. Sometimes I have no clue what she is wailing for and other times, I’m trying to explain to her why painting the cat is not nice. It really is the most […]

#$%!

Finished a “knock you off your feet” blog entry, went to the kitchen to get a drink and came back to the diva “typing” what I can only assume was a love letter to Mickey Mouse. It was GONE, people! GONE! So her punishment was to recreate my awe-inspiring blog entry. I think she did […]

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