Lately it’s been impossible to do anything without a little shadow. I can’t remember the last time I could walk out of the room without screaming, tiny footsteps racing after me. Heaven forbid I actually leave her out of all my fun, like putting laundry away or going to the bathroom. I can’t even get on the computer to check
So, I had to get creative. I discovered her kryptonite: Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. She HATES (read: screams at) Dora the Explorer, Blues Clues and anything else that doesn’t have squeaky voices and big round ears. If I need to make a phone call,
play Words with Friends pay bills or take a break before I lose my mind, I put on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and suddenly she’s transfixed. Nothing in the world matters. I can feed her green beans, actually leave the room for a second, or a bomb could go off and the girl wouldn’t blink. Now, I do feel a little guilty when I see that slack-jawed trance, but c’mon, girl can outlast me any day, any time! Things need to get done and you gotta do what you gotta do, short of locking your child in a dog crate (not that the thought has ever crossed my mind).
There you have it, mommas. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is your best friend. Much better (and cheaper) than all the expensive toys and books that, if they don’t end up broken or lost, become forgotten friendships that fade faster than a Kardashian marriage. I will warn you, there is one hazard: the damn “hot dog song.” I don’t know if there is any tune in the world so addicting. It burns into your brain and anytime anyone mentions a hot dog or says “hot” or “dog,” that song will play over and over in your head until you fall asleep or get drunk. I recommend both, just to be safe.
If you haven’t discovered your child’s Achilles’ heel, give it a try. When the novelty of these mice wear off though, I’m going to need some other ideas. So please, do like your momma taught you and share yours.